Bobthekillerpenguin's Battlefield 3 survival guide part 3
Welcome to part 3 of Bobthekillerpenguin's super duper awesome survival guide for Battlefield 3. Personally, this is my favorite of all the four parts. But don't tell the others. Part 4 (and the full pdf) will be available tomorrow to coincide with Operation: Iron Promise, so be back then! We highly recommend following this guide to the letter for maximum Battlefield 3 performance.
HOW TO SURVIVE... BATTLEFIELD 3
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Food glorious food!
Eat what you want. Eat it as often as you want. Just make sure what you’re eating is keeping you alert and ready to spot and tag. Obviously the better you eat the better you’ll feel. But hey, we love KFC, pizza and burgers so we can’t exactly preach!
Now we are tweaking our food a little bit. Eating more fruit, more vegetables, drinking more water (remember rule 1?) and eating lean meats. We’re also lowering our carbs. WHAT? WHY?!!!!!!!!
Ok, hear us out. We love carbs. We need carbs. We’re just lowering them a bit so we don’t feel too lethargic while we’re road killing Russian/Yanks.
Having said that only you know what your body needs and craves. So do what’s right for you. You can do it! You can do it ALL NIGHT LOOOOONNNNGGG!!!
RULE 5—Pee & poop.
Obvious really. Has to be said though. Don’t hold it in too long. Probably not good for ye old crap factory. Hopefully no image is necessary.
Pictures below demonstrate proper technique.
RULE 7—Take a break.
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Take a break. Funniest thing on here.
RULE 8—Get some Vitamin D.
When you are cooling down your computer (let’s face it you’ll have to at some point), why not get some sunlight you pasty faced Call Of Duty Player! Now we are well aware this completely counteracts Rule 7, but let’s not call it ‘taking a break’. Lets call it ‘letting your computer cool the fuck down!’.
So whilst your machine fails you and your need to play 24/7/365, why not head out-side and scope out some girls, whilst you also get some much needed sun rays?
Vitamin D is important because blah blah blah. Getting out is good because you can see the below.
To be continued.
This was part 3 of Bobthekillerpenguin's BF3 survival guide. Stay tuned tomorrow for part 4 and the full pdf!